EF Will Return… (Halftime)

2023, more like.

Chess legend, Bobby Fischer died at 64 – exact same number of squares on a chess board. (Don’t u just love that). So the joke within the subculture goes that if you play chess you should expect to die at the same age. Like, if it isn’t cancer, or heart or liver failure by then, that girl from The Ring is going to climb out of the television on your 64th birthday and reap your soul with the touch of a cold clammy hand. Ah ’tis a game of fear.

I just turned 32 last month, which means it is halftime (Referee blows whistle). “Noon tea” as the Brits say. Or so I’m told by my soccer friend.

I’m looking around at my peeps like Tom Hanks on Normandy Beach. Everyone in my life is just getting shot to shit… Don’t worry It’s only one perspective. The fear and sadness you let into consciousness so your Grinch heart grows.

Until 64 I’m on borrowed time. Like the washed-up knight from Bergman’s Seventh Seal. I think I’m supposed to use it to, you know, do some good. Not too much, but some. I’m an artist, not a saint. And you know the minute you start trying to make your art good you lose your credibility. And your edge.

I’ve already lost my edge. My secret weapon. Her. With her we were ahead of the curve. Now the test is to see if I can make a good montage without her. Without, MJ’s “Secret Stuff.” Was it Magic? Or just water all along.

No montages in sight. Sad to say. That feeling I had back in the summer turned out to be a job. Just a job. Between work, and spending more time with my family and friends this guy’s heart is pretty well full. But don’t you think for a second my work here is done. I love blogging and making montages. And I have met so many incredible people here on wordpress, from all over the world! I will check on you soon. And “I’ll Be Bach.” Like Awnold.

E.F.✌️